Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize