i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize