So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
