belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
