ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Is it penis luge time yet?
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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