I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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