sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
