we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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