i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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