If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
