I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
