I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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