Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Randomize
