Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
