Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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