I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
