he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
