I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
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