ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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