he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
