dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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