Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
