You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
