it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
