someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Randomize