She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
honey bunches of taint.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
