do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
