Those balls look pretty dangerous.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
