Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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