i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
