Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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