Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
