god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
