my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
