He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You ate ashes out of my bong
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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