Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
