you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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