Me. At least after what I've been through.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Just cropdusted the office
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
