I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
