So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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