so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
