the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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