Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
