I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Randomize