Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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