Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
