small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
