Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
