How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
