Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
