I can't watch pbs sober anymore
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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